Engrish Toys

Tonight, I finally finished unpacking my suitcase from my Midwestern Christmas trip, which contained some gifts that I'd forgotten about getting. Somehow, I overlooked what is clearly one of the better gifts that I received:



As you can see, it's a Pooping Sheep by Midlon Foods. Given the level of sophistication of my sense of humor, they correctly assumed that I'd find this to be the height of hilarity. After all, it's a sheep, it poops, and it even comes with its own ammunition. What could be funnier? Moving on.

Although the package's verbiage is correct, I noticed a few peculiarities.


I find it odd that the Christmas tree is touting the inherent yumminess of the sheep's deposits. Now, I'm not going to say that I've not seen a talking tree before, but it was usually preceded by seeing Jerry and his brethren perform Sugaree or the like. Here is another oddity:

If you look directly right of the couch, there appears to be an ewe in the midst of either a pelvic exam or an unspeakable sex act that rhymes with zunnibingus. Of course, they leave us hanging by masking the identity of the mystery diner behind the couch. Regardless, as a man who is in his element in Midwestern culture, I realize that certain allowances must be made with respect to amorous intentions towards the species. However, I final this final item rather disturbing:


Notice the line that states: Not suitable for children under 36 months due to small parts. I can't argue with this, the toy could constitute a choking hazard to a small child. Apparently, though, it's acceptable to teach 3 year olds that animal excrement can provide hours of fun as well as a tasty snack. Following this logic, I will be looking forward to receiving a Litterbox Lunchbox next Christmas.