Monday, April 02, 2007

Getting Back To My Roots

I have previously discussed the fact that I'm too stupid to be Jewish and too white to be black, although I may be black enough to be K-Fed. Nevertheless, the marketing geniuses at Verizon have decided that I can handle being Korean:


Don't get the idea that I'm ridiculing Koreans. I would be honored to be part of any race or nationality so advanced that it can communicate via anthropomorphized maxi-pads:


Thus, from here on, please refrain from referring to me as TFG and use my Korean name instead: Huang Tu Lo. Thanks. I'll close with this inspirational Korean proverb: Shibural jot kat'un nigimi jot manhan ddong mul eh t'wigyo jukil ship sekia.

22 Comments:

At 7:11 AM, Blogger Kalleigh Hathaway said...

I told you that legally changing your name to "Got Big Wang" would really NOT be that amusing longterm, but you wouldn't listen.

 
At 7:55 AM, Blogger DBDP said...

It's odd that "eemee sheemee pek poejee dah" is considered an insult In Korean. Different strokes for different folks, I guess. Wouldn't you agree, Go-ja?

 
At 8:17 AM, Blogger Luck o' the Irish said...

Dude, Clare Fang has it IN for you.

 
At 9:19 AM, Blogger Hanmee said...

Dude, that name is Chinese not Korean.

You need something like Kim Won Suk (yes, that's a real name) or go a step further - Kim Dong Suk?

Although I could read that Korean, I have not much idea what it meant, other than them using the word "phone" and "net". Strangely enough though, I could probably understand it better if someone spoke to me.

I find myself unable to use the polite form in Korean except for a few items, and yet I understand what my relatives say. I won't understand word for word, but somewhere, buried deep down, I've retained some knowledge from my childhood and understand the gist of their question.

 
At 10:52 AM, Anonymous lori said...

I love how asians feel the need to animate everything. It validates my obsession with anime.

 
At 11:27 AM, Blogger Charles said...

How in the world?

I wonder what was the basis for sending you that letter.

"His name Looks Korean?!!?"

"We ran out of English Letters, so lets just send the next best thing!!!"

 
At 1:38 PM, Blogger Serena Joy said...

LMAO! That's hysterically funny and, geez, who wouldn't find dancing maxi pads endearing?

 
At 2:28 PM, Blogger Broadsheet said...

I think you got profiled.

How racist is that?

 
At 5:10 PM, Blogger Arlene said...

You killin me!! And laughing hurts!

 
At 5:39 PM, Blogger tfg said...

This comment has been removed by the author.

 
At 5:41 PM, Blogger tfg said...

kalleigh-Yes, but it makes doing my tax returns so much fun.

dookie- Absolutely, jot dae ga ri.

LOTI-I'm not worried. My Jiujitsu is very strong.

hanmee- Does Nun Tu Yung sound Korean enough?

lori-I know. I would have thought that they'd find that demeaning, but apparently not.

charles, broadsheet-My last name actually does look Korean. Regardless, I am 100% white boy, so their efforts are lost on me.

serena- Actually, the ones with wings are even funnier, because you throw them like boomerangs.

arlene-Thanks and get better.

 
At 8:03 PM, Blogger Katherine said...

Huang, Ay shibal! Hmm, there's just something about swearing in another language that is so childish and fun!

 
At 9:48 PM, Blogger Scary Monster said...

Me believes that someone be clowning with you for a change.

Maxipad phones, hmmm. Wonder if they let you call collect?
STOMP

 
At 11:20 AM, Blogger Diesel said...

Verizon made me disconnect my phone line -- when I moved 100 feet to another house on the same lot -- and when I reconnected it they had disabled my DSL. Then they had the gall to tell me that they had no more slots available, so I could no longer get DSL. Idiots.

 
At 1:44 PM, Blogger Serena Joy said...

Actually, the ones with wings are even funnier, because you throw them like boomerangs.

Bummer. I didn't know guys were onto that trick.:)

 
At 2:46 PM, Blogger The Muse said...

I prefer swearing in Dutch. Ah, the sounds of my childhood...

 
At 11:51 AM, Blogger Monkey said...

Pleased to meet you "Got Big Wang".

I just popped over here to tell you that your comments on ACW always make me laugh out loud. Literally. The cats are frightened.

 
At 7:57 PM, Blogger tfg said...

Katherine- I agree, except for pig latin, which just sounds kind of dorkish.

scary-Good thinking. Perhaps, they even include a Tampax earpiece.

diesel-If it wasn't for the quality of Verizon's coverage across the US, I'd never use them.

Muse-Dutch? I guess this means that you can give an authentic Dutch Oven.

monkey-Thanks. Honestly, I expect that ACW has had flatulence funnier than anything that I've posted here.

 
At 10:16 PM, Blogger Gucci Muse said...

Maybe your last name is one that can be either or, like Lee.

 
At 2:46 AM, Blogger Deb said...

Oh my God, on a day that's been a shitstorm, you have me in stitches here.

 
At 12:28 AM, Blogger NAME: Dr. Kenneth Noisewater said...

Korean cus words are so in right now.

 
At 4:21 PM, Blogger Malnurtured Snay said...

Happy Giant Bunny Rabbit Day!

 

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